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Actual analogies and metapohrs found in High School essays [Archive] - Gamers Gateway

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Sman25000
04-16-2004, 02:10 AM
Actual analogies and metaphors found in HS essays..these are funny

-His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underwear in a dryer without cling free.

-He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a
guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of
those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking
at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without
one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

-She grew on him like she was a colony of e.coli and he was
room-temperature Canadian beef.

-She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

-Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

-He was as tall as a six-foot three inch tree.

-The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because
of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a
formerly surcharge-free ATM.

-The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

-McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a hefty bag filled
with vegetable soup.

-From the attic came an unearthly how. The whole scene had an eerie,
surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and
jeopardy comes on at 7:00 pm instead of 7:30.

-Long separated by cruel fate, the star crossed lovers raced across the
grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left
Cleveland at 6:36 pm traveling 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 pm
at a speed of 35 mph.

-He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the
East river.

-Even in his last year, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only
one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

-Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

-The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Bill. But unlike Bill,
this plan just might work.

-The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating
for a while.

-He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but
a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine
or something.

-It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing their kids around
with power tools.

-He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as
if she were a garage truck backing up.

-She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.

-It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to
the wall.

Masta Loki
04-16-2004, 06:41 PM
:lol: those are great

thegloaming
04-16-2004, 07:13 PM
funny, very funny :lol:

Loop
04-16-2004, 08:41 PM
ROFL! :lol:

30111987
04-16-2004, 08:59 PM
very good :lol

Phatbowser
04-17-2004, 05:23 AM
Aww thats good.

EatDust
04-17-2004, 06:15 AM
Actual analogies and metaphors found in HS essays..these are funny

-He was as tall as a six-foot three inch tree.

-The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

-The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating
for a while.

-It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to
the wall.

LMAO!!! those were great :lol:

sandok
04-18-2004, 05:07 PM
ROFL :lol: Where did ya get those? :D

Giants8189
04-18-2004, 06:59 PM
hahahahahahaha funny as hell

QuizMaster
04-19-2004, 12:03 AM
As tall as a 6-foot 3-inch tree.......horrible! lol